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Old 07-12-2011, 08:23 PM   #1
Auzuigcx

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Salaam Aleikum wa Rahamatullah wa Barakatu. I have a question...obviously hence the title. My wife and I know this non-Muslim man whom is her sister's father. They have two different fathers, my wife's real father is a known child molester so she has no relations with him. We have only known this man for less than a year. My wife refers to him as her father, he is not married to her mother by the way, she is married to another man. My dilema is that he has been very disrespectful and tries to get me to answer to him but I do not. I know that it is my right in Islam to keep him away from my family. However this will likely hurt my wife's feelings. I would greatly appreciate advice on how to go about this along with anything from the Qu'ran and Hadith Inshallah. Private messages are also welcome. Jazakallah Khair.
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Old 07-12-2011, 08:58 PM   #2
fedelwet

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Salaam Aleikum wa Rahamatullah wa Barakatu. I have a question...obviously hence the title. My wife and I know this non-Muslim man whom is her sister's father. They have two different fathers, my wife's real father is a known child molester so she has no relations with him. We have only known this man for less than a year. My wife refers to him as her father, he is not married to her mother by the way, she is married to another man. My dilema is that he has been very disrespectful and tries to get me to answer to him but I do not. I know that it is my right in Islam to keep him away from my family. However this will likely hurt my wife's feelings. I would greatly appreciate advice on how to go about this along with anything from the Qu'ran and Hadith Inshallah. Private messages are also welcome. Jazakallah Khair.


How does your Mrs feel about this? Have you spoken to her and told her about your concerns?

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Old 07-12-2011, 09:04 PM   #3
Auzuigcx

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I have not spoken to her yet. She is in another state. I am going to go get her this Saturday. I will tell her then. I know she will be hurt by it but it is for the best. P.S. she is a Muslim too by the way.
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Old 07-12-2011, 09:06 PM   #4
fedelwet

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I have not spoken to her yet. She is in another state. I am going to go get her this Saturday. I will tell her then. I know she will be hurt by it but it is for the best. P.S. she is a Muslim too by the way.


Is the Muslimah your current wife or Ex-wife? I don't understand that part?

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Old 07-12-2011, 09:19 PM   #5
Auzuigcx

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She is my current and only wife. She is on vacation at her mom's house.
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Old 07-12-2011, 09:31 PM   #6
fedelwet

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She is my current and only wife. She is on vacation at her mom's house.


Understood.

What you should do is first gauge the situation and thoroughly think about her reaction.

If she is completely going to go off a tangent and react unreasonably then you have two choices:

  1. Be patient and deal with it for the sake of your relationship and this is the most superior option.
  2. Confront the men himself and speak to him directly and tell him that you donít appreciate his tone, mannerism etc and request him to keep your wife out of this discussion and say that this is a man-to-man discussion. If he is a NASTY PIECE OF WORK then donít attempt this as it will backfire but if he half decent it will solve the problem.


If there is hope of her understanding your point of view then it is best that you discuss the matter with her and make her approach him.

At no point should this become a problem for your relationship. I donít know how often you have to deal with him but it may be that patience is your best option.

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Old 07-12-2011, 09:39 PM   #7
Auzuigcx

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Thank you brother for the advice. I will indeed speak to him face to face, I will bar him from coming to my house and my wife and our kids as he is only a strange non-Muslim man. If he forcibly attempts to enter our house I will exercise my rights by the laws of Allah and slay him. Once again thank you brother for the advice. May Allah Reward you.
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Old 07-12-2011, 11:00 PM   #8
fedelwet

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This is what I SAID:


Understood.

What you should do is first gauge the situation and thoroughly think about her reaction.

If she is completely going to go off a tangent and react unreasonably then you have two choices:

  1. Be patient and deal with it for the sake of your relationship and this is the most superior option.
  2. Confront the men himself and speak to him directly and tell him that you donít appreciate his tone, mannerism etc and request him to keep your wife out of this discussion and say that this is a man-to-man discussion. If he is a NASTY PIECE OF WORK then donít attempt this as it will backfire but if he half decent it will solve the problem.


If there is hope of her understanding your point of view then it is best that you discuss the matter with her and make her approach him.

At no point should this become a problem for your relationship. I donít know how often you have to deal with him but it may be that patience is your best option.

This is what you CONCLUDED from the post above:
Thank you brother for the advice. I will indeed speak to him face to face, I will bar him from coming to my house and my wife and our kids as he is only a strange non-Muslim man. If he forcibly attempts to enter our house I will exercise my rights by the laws of Allah and slay him. Once again thank you brother for the advice. May Allah Reward you.
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Old 07-12-2011, 11:02 PM   #9
Suentiend

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This is what I SAID:


This is what you CONCLUDED from the post above:
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