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#1 |
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To
Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity You should try at least one! ![]() 1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses On And Point A Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice! 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries With That. 4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks . Once Everyone Has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso. 5. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ' For Marijuana '. 6. Skip Down The Hall Rather Than Walk And See How Many Looks You Get. 7. Order A Diet Water Whenever You Go Out To Eat, With A Serious Face. 8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'. 9. Sing Along At The Opera. 10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You ... Have A Headache. 11. When The Money Comes Out Of The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!' 12. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!' 13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.' And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity 14. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS. ![]() |
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#2 |
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#5 |
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#6 |
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#7 |
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It's pretty hard to get your own
kids to laugh at a joke. They are either too young to get it, or too cool to think it's funny. On a similar note, I read somewhere that Billy Joel's teenage daughter asked him to "PULEEEZ... stop singing in the car." Then again comedy writer Dave Barry once picked his son up from middle school in the Oscar Meyer Wiener Wagon, which is probably going over the top in trying to get your teen to think you have a sense of humor. |
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#8 |
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#11 |
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