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Old 11-17-2017, 03:32 AM   #1
arry J

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Dec 2016
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Default what we know. With how many wins doth the Blue Jays finish?A) <70 -- I
MEDICINE HAT, Alta. Eddie Lack Jersey . -- Tommy Vannelli scored in overtime for Medicine Hat as the Tigers edged the Brandon Wheat Kings 4-3 in Western Hockey League action Wednesday. Vannelli beat Brandon goaltender Jordan Papirny just 32 seconds into OT on the power play. Miles Koules, Markus Eisenschmid and Trevor Cox also scored and Marek Langhamer stopped 26 shots for the Tigers (16-5-3), who maintained their two-point lead atop the Eastern Conference. Jesse Gabrielle scored twice for the Wheat Kings (13-11-1), while Eric Roy added a single and Papirny finished with 26 saves. --- RAIDERS 1 BRONCOS 0 PRINCE ALBERT, Sask. -- Carson Perreaux scored the lone goal of the game to lift the Raiders past Swift Current. Perreauxs goal 10 minutes into the first period was all Prince Albert (14-8-2) needed in a game featuring just one penalty to the Broncos in the second. The loss, and Medicine Hats win, kept the Broncos (15-10-3) from tying the Tigers atop the Eastern Conference. Cole Cheveldave finished with 26 saves for the Raiders, while Landon Bow stopped 30 shots for Swift Current. --- SILVERTIPS 3 HURRICANES 2 LETHBRIDGE, Alta. -- Tyler Sandhu gave the Silvertips the only lead they would need against the WHLs worst team. Sandhu scored 5:45 into the third after Ivan Nikolishin tied the game for Everett just 56 seconds into the period. Jujhar Khaira also scored and Austin Lotz had 16 saves for league-leading Everett (17-4-4). Josh Derko and Jamal Watson scored for lowly Lethbridge (3-18-4), while Corbin Boes stopped 29 shots. --- ICE 4 REBELS 3 RED DEER, Alta. -- Tim Bozon scored in the third period as Kootenay edged the Rebels. Jagger Dirk, Luke Philp and Zak Zborosky also scored for the Ice (13-11-2), who overcame a 2-0 deficit in the first period. Dominik Volek scored twice for Red Deer (11-12-1), and Evan Polei added a single. Jayden Sittler stopped 27 shots for Kootenay after replacing starting goaltender Wyatt Hoflin, who allowed three goals on 12 shots. Patrik Bartosak stopped 39 shots for the Rebels. --- ROYALS 4 ROCKETS 1 KELOWNA, B.C. -- The Royals handed the Rockets their first loss in 10 games. Ben Walker, Tyler Soy, Austin Carroll and Brandon Fushimi scored for Victoria (15-10-1), which came alive in the third period with three goals. Tyson Baillie had the lone goal for Kelowna (16-3-2). Patrik Polivka finished with 26 saves for Victoria, while Jordon Cooke allowed all four goals on 19 shots in Kelownas net. --- CHIEFS 5 GIANTS 4 SPOKANE, Wash. -- Carter Proft scored just over a minute into overtime as the Chiefs rallied past the Giants. Jeremy McIntosh, Mike Aviani, Mitch Holmberg and Connor Chartier also scored for Spokane (16-7-1), which scored twice in the third period to come back from a 4-2 deficit. Cain Franson, Trent Lofthouse, Carter Popoff and Dalton Thrower scored for Vancouver (10-11-5). Chiefs goalie Eric Williams made 28 saves, while Payton Lee finished with 32 stops for the Giants. Cam Ward Jersey . First-half goals by Will Bruin and Oscar Boniek Garcia sucked the life out of the Impact as the Houston Dynamo bounced them from Major League Soccers post-season with a 3-0 victory on Thursday. Julien Gauthier Jersey . Dwyane Wade followed a few days later. Elias Lindholm Big & Tall Jersey: Authentic Womens Kids Youth Hurricanes Hockey Jerseys . Hattestad managed to avoid the carnage midway through the mens final, as a crash took out three skiers, essentially leaving two men vying for gold. The Norwegian posted a time of 3:38.39, outlasting Swedens Teodor Peterson, who took silver with a time of 3:39.I told him the Jays were a desperate bunch, which is cheddar cheese to a puppy dog in devil-speak. I gave him my hard sell. Cmon, buddy. Cmon, Sweet Lu. Our All Star-shortstop Jose Reyes, finally healthy, literally leads off the season by taking his first at bat, popping out, then proceeding to walk off the field and on to the disabled list. Maybe hes out for two weeks, maybe four months, maybe hes taking up painting. The team, left with a defence only Abbott and Costello could love, is even more desperate than when it was just known for jettisoning its best young talent for knuckleballers pushing 40 - he stopped me right there. He smiled deep and wide, his horns dewy with anticipation. He was ready to make a deal.Fine, I said. I will bypass my desires for fame or fortune or a game of wall ball with Lloyd Moseby and put my deal making skills to work for our boys in royal blue. So, fellow fan, you are welcome. Allow me to outline the exact details of how this season is going to go down (as hashed out between me and Mr. Three Prong, Son of Perdition).(Disclaimer: if you are planning to use this remarkably accurate information for gambling, I urge you to keep investing that extra money into lotto scratchers, lest we have a Back To The Future situation on our hands. APRIL (14-13 record, .519)The Jays whimper out of the gate, getting crushed on Opening Day, then lose 7 of 10, doing a bang-on impersonation of the mediocre team we thought they were. Thats when the cauldron bubbles and the thick smoke rolls in and the creepy carnival comes to town. What happens specifically? Maybe the entire Red Sox roster contracts syphilis. Maybe Derek Jeter becomes a clubhouse cancer in his final diva-tirade-filled season. Maybe Camden Yards becomes Marlo Stanfield turf. Maybe Tampa Bay management decides the empty cavern they play in would be better monetized by jai alai tournaments. Listen, I dont ask El Diablo how he gets stuff done, I just sit back and enjoy the results which Im assured come with no consequences. MAY (31-26, .544)Little known fact about devil-dealing: May is Buy One, Get One Free Month! Thats across the board, whether youre looking for life extension or to unravel the happiness of a sworn enemy. Why not do both?Truly, Beelzebub has little to do with the Blue Jay surge of May. The team plays a whopping 18 games at home, and with the city still suffering from an endless winter, the Rogers Centre roof is only opened once all month, a paralyzing condition visiting teams cannot physically handle (the technical term is "depression"). (Sidenote: I apologize for not asking The Crimson Sausage, Enemy Of Christ to improve the weather. The Cable Box on Blue Jay Way is the Bikram Yoga studio of stadiums.*) (*Bikram yoga is also known as hot yoga.**) (**Hot yoga is a thing you do when you are a 22-year-old girl or a thing you do when you are trying to impress a 22-year-old girl).JUNE (48-36, .571)Until mid-June, the league hadnt noticed the Jays ascension to the ranks of the privileged, largely because after twenty years spent ignoring someone, it is perfectly understandable that you might mistakenly walk past them in the hall and fail to notice the shotgun they are holding. But the Jays had now arrived, andd their demands were going to be met, even if Barb in accounting didnt know their goddamn name. Jake Bean Jersey. Josh Thole was gonna make sure you remember.We gotta give props to The Author Of All Sin, because he works the impossible this month. Jose Reyes is back in the lineup in time for his birthday (June 11) and his bobblehead day (June 8 for those fair weather fans planning to attend). To think, how many nasty critics said meaningful baseball would never be played in Toronto again in July?JULY (62-48, .564)With just a paltry nine home games on tap, our Blue Man Group must do their damage on the road, visiting Tampa Bay, New York and Boston. In a month-long celebration of Canada Day, our national baseball representatives do just that, proving Canadians to be fearless and capable. (Flipside: After witnessing the condition of our departing players hotel rooms, it is clear we Canucks may lack some respect for the environment. I believe the players call it, "doing it Harper-style").The All-Star break falls in July, an annual tradition typically partaken by Jose Bautista and a middle reliever nobody knew was on the team. 2014 proves to be no different despite being a dozen games over .500 at the break. Respect will have to be earned. FYI, did you wanna know who wins this years All-Star game, giving their respective League home field advantage in the World Series? Answer: NOBODY. Nobody [expletive] wins with a rule that stupid.AUGUST (79-57, .581)On August 11, Colby Rasmus turns 28. That same day, Melky Cabrera turns 30. The Prince Of Darkness promises me these achievements will be met and hes been totally standup so far.Playing every division rival at home this month, The Descendants of Alfredo Griffin enjoy their greatest month this century, forcing Vegas to recognize them as a team and set World Series odds. They are given 60-1 chances, though in metric it works out to a more sensible 18-1.(For those of you uncomfortable with how fashioned this season is by Oh Wicked One, Im not saying you have to worship the Father Of All Lies, Founder Of Murder. Im just saying, if youre a ball fan, you should probably send him a card. Maybe bath salts. Nothing fancy).SEPTEMBER (93-69, .574)A peculiar month of scheduling down the home stretch. Sensibly, the Jays visit every division rivals park. Oddly, they play the Chicago Cubs for an unknown reason my sources tell me may have involved money and bad judgement.2014 ends in a dog fight -- a climax of tension and emotion and games that are still a little too long -- all in the service of the Jays holding on for their first playoff appearance ever (in the lives of the children whose aging fathers drag them to the games). We did it! Were number 4 or 5!And there you have it: 93 wins. 1 wild card spot. 0 logical discrepancies. Is it getting hot in here?Gallays Poll #5Lets say we dont know what we know. With how many wins doth the Blue Jays finish?A) <70 -- I am familiar with the team. The win total will be commensurate with the talent level.B) 70-81 -- I dont pay much attention to the baseballs but have read a few headlines.C) 82-89 -- I rarely hear about the Jays anymore. Is Kelly Gruber still with the team?D) 90+ -- I dont understand how baseball works. 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