[DrKirkNoliss]

Pancho, Surfs Up posted this

three days ago:
Now you positively gotta check

this one out
there is a behavioral consulting company in New York City called First Impressions. Among their

services they have a dating simulation. A psychologist meets with you in a public area, a restaurant or something,

and you have a pretend date for two or three hours. Then the psychologist prepares you a detailed report of your

communication styles, strengths, weaknesses and which specific behaviors, attitudes, personal approaches are

hindering the way other potential (mates, girl/boyfriends, hookups, business associates, and so on) will perceive

you IN SPITE OF how you believe you are perceived. I read their book where they detail the long list of behaviors we

have that we think are sending positive or neutral signals that are in fact turning people off, shutting down

communication, running the interaction into the ground.... I guess the take home message is that the great majority

of us don't have high quality feedback that will let us fine tune our presentation, and that many of us suffer life

long "social underachievement" as a direct result.... and that's a horrifying thought...

here ya go

:

http://www.firstimpressionsconsulti...ges/dating.h

tml





Hmmm, somebody's found a way to make a buck off of this problem.

[BriKevin]

Thanks for showing that post!

I'm not about to drop $$$ on that, though...

Well, there’s no such thing as an objective

observer; so results depend mostly on the person observing you.

By objective, I mean impartial. In other

words, they don't need to stroke your ego and don't worry about hurting your feelings. They have no personal

stake except to help.


I don't get why people don't do this type of thing. Why wouldn't people want to

know how they come off so they can improve if they want to? We do it in the business world all of the time with

interviews, but we never do it for our personal relationships. I'd love for once to have someone tell me what they

thought of my mannerisms and actions in contrast to who I really am.


-Why won't you go out with me? Is it

because I have a tissue up my nose?
--You're getting warm!

--- Seinfeld

The only time I ever get

feedback is from a drunk person who's leaving or seeing me off...then they tell me how great I am.

[VomsVomaMew]

Hey you guys know of anywhere on

the west coast?

[mymnduccete]

Well, there’s no such thing as an

objective observer; so results depend mostly on the person observing you.
I’ve had the business equivalent of

this (mostly to evaluate how I deal with potentially troublesome individuals) and it was very helpful.

This

is geared more towards public speaking, but Toast Masters is also very good. You get a diversity of opinions on the

same speech.

[BriKevin]

Wouldn't you like to have someone monitor your interactions with people and give you feedback on what they saw

happening from an objective third party? I wish you could just talk to someone and then ask them right afterwards

what they thought of you during that conversation. The only time you ever get feedback like that is during a mock

interview for a job.

Has anyone ever done this? In other words, actually had a conversation with someone and

had someone objectively evaluate how it went? I think that would be a great way to improve yourself, but the

opportunity to do this just isn't there, in my opinion. Any thoughts?