[zzarratusstra]

Hey folks,

I dug through some other posts on gift giving and I found some good advice but I haven't really found the whole answer I am looking for.

First I'll outline my situation and then ask a couple questions. I am going back to Thailand in February to see a girl I met and became romantically involved with on my first trip there this last October. It might seem a bit early to be buying gifts for the trip, but it the time of year for deals here in the US so I thought it might be worth getting started.

We will be going to visit her family up in central Thailand for part of my visit. Most importantly her elderly mom, 10 y.o. son, some older brothers and her childhood "best girlfriend".

My first question is just a read on gift giving in Thai culture in general. Some cultures are very 'gifty', others not so much. Where do you think Thai culture falls in this spectrum? Should I stock up on lots of small generic gifts for folks or just worry about the most important individuals?

Most specifically I am asking about ideas for mom and son. I have met both of them previously and we got along well, but it was a surprise meeting so I didn't even have a chance to pick up flowers for mom for our first meeting. I can't say I'm too excited about chocolates or souvenir stuff as gifts for these two.

I saw in another post that kitchen stuff was an appreciated gift, so I was thinking about maybe something like that for her mom, but I am kind of stumped as to what would be useful and appreciated. A good quality kitchen knife/cleaver? Are there any Thai beliefs around giving knives as gifts as there are in some cultures?

For the boy I am thinking books maybe, if I can find the right books in Thai. By the right books I mean the kind of stuff I liked reading when I was a kid, or at least ones that will get him excited about reading. I grew up on old school science fiction and fantasy stuff, Burroughs, Heinlein, Tolkien, but I might settle for Harry Potter. I'm all about sparking that reading bug in young minds, so really whatever will do the job is OK with me. Alternatively I was thinking a pro quality soccer ball as I believe he is currently more of a sports minded kid.

All suggestions are and advice are very welcome!

[L8fGLM4d]

most kids spend insanely long hours at school and they are not taught how to enjoy reading. the vast majority of children and youngsters only read cartoons. of course he can easily be an exception but maybe the best would be to ask his mom if he would enjoy Harry Potter or if she could recommend something.
also, maybe a skateboard / roller skates or some nice branded clothes?
I would definitely check with his mother.

yes, I think it would be nice to stock up on small gifts that you could give to cousins / little kids in the family. if you visit cousins or extended family, you could always pick up a gift basket with fruits, chocolate and stuff at a market. Thais seem to give these often and they are on offer everywhere.

I don't think knives are a good idea but I cannot think of anything at all without knowing more about the family. as a generic present for an elderly woman, I would pick up a very nice potted orchid at my local market but that's just me and my circumstances (I live in Thailand).

hope you will get more advice, I am not very sure about anything here at all, but I wanted to reply anyway because you hadn't received any replies.

[VipInoLo]

Well when I was a kid I hated reading, due to the fact what I was given to read was something I was never interested in. It was not till I got a set of encyclopedia I got interested in reading, because that way I found a book big enough to find something I wanted to read about, I could just read little parts here and there, the other book I liked to read was the atlas, well today these books have been superseded by the Internet. Buying a book for me was not good, It was likely I was not interested in it and ignored it. I think the 10 year old kid could do with a soccer ball or a frisbee, or even am American gridiron ball would be a very uneek gift. The aging mother could do with something to make her drudgery easier, and your girlfriend has you.

[sarasaraseda]

I often get my Thai mom perfumed powder and other small gifts. I also splurged this year and got my Thai sister nice handbags and immediately saw the slight look of envy on my mom's face...so it will be a handbag for her next time I'm there.

I've often tried kitchen accessories, but they haven't always been successful because there is so much difference between what I use in my American kitchen and what she uses in Thailand. While traveling in Mexico a few years back, I sent her a set of placemats, coasters and cloth napkins. I knew that she didn't usually use placemats, but figured it would be exotic and interesting. I didn't expect that she would have no idea at all what any of the things were. In a later visit to Thailand, She brought them out to me all still wrapped up and asked me what they were for. When I told her she laughed politely and put them back in the cupboard. I also once bought her a set of tea towells or kitchen towells in fun colors that I knew she would like. They also went unused. One day we were preparing for a big party and having to wash a million dishes. I went in the cupboard and got out the dish towels and volunteered to "dry". I forgot that in the Thailand sun....there is no need. My Thai mom remarked "you Americans have specific towells for oddly specific reasons, don't you?" However, when we took a ferry to Malaysia and passed by duty free...all she wanted to do was look at the pots and pans. (mental note...okay, not just handbags, but pots and pans!)

On the books...yes, comic books are probably the way to go. It's important to know the kid though...is he a reader? Does he even read English? I haven't bought for a boy in a long time (my Thai brother is now all grown up). I got him a mix of sporting goods and clothing over the years. In fact, this year, I got him a sporting good and his reaction was, "What, am I a kid?"

[Misespimb]

Some good quality khanom (Sweets) would be enough.

Being there is enough, you can later on decide for a gift to her mom and son while being there.

Don't think too much and take it easy.

Peace.

[zzarratusstra]

Some good quality khanom (Sweets) would be enough.

Being there is enough, you can later on decide for a gift to her mom and son while being there.

Don't think too much and take it easy.

Peace.

Yeah maybe I am over thinking it. I'm doing the other holiday shopping now and I sort of thought I would be getting a couple things done at once.

My girl and I will be spending a few days in BKK before heading up country so maybe I'll just shop with her then.

[Misespimb]

Save your money dear, if this a true girl for you she and her whole family won't look for your money, "poor or rich" you Capp will be more important to them than your money. they will look to you as a member of family not a "walking ATM".

Peace.

[Misespimb]

I forgot Capp, please stay away from the international expert .

[L8fGLM4d]

a present doesn't necessarily have to be expensive, no need to go into the walking ATM issue.... but I think it is embarrassing to walk into a family gathering without anything to give to the people who host you. especially if they treat you for dinner or you stay with them not in a hotel. a couple of hundred baht surely can't hurt anyone?

[jimmy28]

I wouldn't think a 10 year old Thai boy would be interested in books by the Authors that you have mentioned. If it were a year or two ago I would suggest anything to do with Ultraman.
If he likes football then ask his mum which team he supports,chances are it would be either Man U or Chelsea and then get him a T-shirt or replica shirt depending on how much you want to spend.
For other family members my wife usually buys shirts or wallets for the men and handbags for the women. Along with these she usually gets some deoderant sprays and perfumes to hand out.
The gifts do not have to be expensive,the fact that they are from outside of Thailand and the thought is what counts.

[VipInoLo]

I forgot Capp, please stay away from the international expert .

Some people can get very jealous of the international experts knowledge.

[Misespimb]

Some people can get very jealous of the international experts knowledge.

Boh Maan, LOOOOOOOOOOOL

Kapon Lelai Doh.

[zzarratusstra]

a present doesn't necessarily have to be expensive, no need to go into the walking ATM issue.... but I think it is embarrassing to walk into a family gathering without anything to give to the people who host you. especially if they treat you for dinner or you stay with them not in a hotel. a couple of hundred baht surely can't hurt anyone?

This is exactly what I hope to avoid I'm not shooting for expensive or flashy but I have somewhat of an aversion to buying cheap crap as well. There are a couple of local candy shops that produce their own quality products so I will probably stock up there. Thanks for the advice

A clarification on the book idea, I was definitely thinking of Thai language translations, not English language versions. I also feel that the authors I mentioned wrote some timeless adventure tales that can be enjoyed by any generation. The point may be moot as I haven't been able to track down any thing I was looking for anyway.

[durootrium]

i just learn so mutch from these posts

[Misespimb]

Money has no value in love terms.

I make bara for long time “used in Som-tam Lao+++” and the relation between “buyers and seller is friendship rather benefit” who came back to buy large qty each time.

You still think too much.

Peace

[L8fGLM4d]

Money has no value in love terms.

I make bara for long time “used in Som-tam Lao+++” and the relation between “buyers and seller is friendship rather benefit” who came back to buy large qty each time.

You still think too much.

Peace

someone who understands please clarify.
or, rather, please don't.

[Misespimb]

someone who understands please clarify.
or, rather, please don't.

Direct this question to me and I have the answer.

Peace.