[loikrso]

If I get elected, all the homeless people will be given people homes, all the starving people will be given food, and all the little children will be given kittens. ^_^

[womberte]

If I get elected, there won't be any more time wasting elections

[RedImmik]

Originally posted by Asher

If I get elected, I will pander to everyone who voted for me.

The question is, do you want me to pander to you, or pander to everyone else? Don't be a panderpants, be a peace-peddler!

[Qeiafib]

Originally posted by Asher
If I get elected, I will liberate Texas and allow it to be fully independent. That's one common plank in our platforms.

[alicewong]

Originally posted by Asher

If I get elected, I will mail you a campaign button. This is one promise I will keep. I LOVE buttons!

Where do you go to get your buttons made inexpensively, I don't wanna break Mr. Porkenbankers.

[Nikkytas]

No more years! No more years!





Because we are all dead. So f*cking, f*cking dead...

[EmpaccalGah]

Originally posted by Asher


I'll have to one-up you then. I'll also give you New Mexico, Arkansas, and Oklahoma and make them your slave states. Now you're testing my resolve.

[Gymngatagaica]

I'll support you, GePap, on condition that:

1. US citizenship will be abolished. We are citizens of the world and the world is our constituency.
2. Football becomes the National Passtime. The Beckham kind, not the Owens kind.
3. Texas is outlawed.
4. A Marine brigade is deployed to Hans Island. They will immidiately evict any Danish cheese factrories found there.
5. Anyone connected to senior management of an investment bank be sent to Gitmo for debriefing. These are the real terrorists who have struck a mortal blow to the heart of our system.

[Controller]

Originally posted by GePap
If I get elected, there won't be any more time wasting elections Hey I was first with that!

[evammaUselp]

Originally posted by GePap
Hmmm.... I guess I can throw my hat in the ring. Looking for a fellow progressive/radical/absolutist megalomaniac to fill out the ticket.
I believe I may fit that description.

[oyymoss]

Three words:

Naked. Babe. Threads.


And yes, that's male and female naked babe threads. I win.

[johnlohanmclee]

Voters would rather have a beer while ogling naked boobies. Screw truth, they want promises.

[zooworms]

I suggest we all suspend our campaigns due to incredibly important server issues we need to address and allow me to win.

[Kayakeenemeds]

Originally posted by Imran Siddiqui
I suggest we all suspend our campaigns due to incredibly important server issues we need to address and allow me to win. I suggest you suck it, suck it like Cthulhu will suck the stars infinitely through your eyes of madness screaming.

[NofFoomiTot]

Breaking: Former Vice President Al Gore has endorsed Cthulhu.



Translation: "U can haz cheezberger Cthulhu, I iz cheezberger, eat me!"

[cestsennY]

Grammar Nazis will be punished even worse.