[iodillalm]

okay, i've had a fat crush on a really good friend for a while now. the problem is that we've both moved to different schools now, so even if she did like me back (which she doesn't in that way), it wouldn't work anyway due to the distance.

so my dilemma is that i still have feelings for her, and i don't want them. i'm still kinda new to this whole love/crush thing so i'm kinda lost on what to do now. it's only hurting me now since nothing's gonna work and i know it. i've discovered it's REALLY hard to let go even if you really want to. any thoughts?

[PheliarearY]

They say time heals all wounds, how much time is another thing.

Someone once said to me 'out of sight, out of mind', and it does help. Cut them out if you cant find a way to keep them in your life.

[Wezfyowk]

The best way, but not the easiest is to find someone else

I know thats the last thing u wanna do, but it works like hell!!!

[newspetty]

They say time heals all wounds, how much time is another thing.

Someone once said to me 'out of sight, out of mind', and it does help. Cut them out if you cant find a way to keep them in your life.

Do NOT take that literally.

[iodillalm]

yeah, time is taking forever in this case..

also, another problem is she's one of my best friends and i'd like to keep her friendship, but i can't stop thinking about her and it's driving my stomach and heart up the wall. ugh.

and finding someone else would be nice, but i'm not too sharp in the relationship category. plus i just moved to san jose and know almost nobody here so that's another issue. it all kind of compounded all at once. it's quite overwhelming.

[Ingeborga]

It is overwhelming mate I know exactly what your going through

Everyone says it, and recently I've had this and thought really bad thoughts but time really does heal this crap. Just go out and have fun with mates and forget it

[lollypopz]

Think ive always been lucky about turning my feelings on and off, me and my ex were together for 4 years, she decided to call it quits by texting me, but she still wanted to be friends, i made a decision then and there no one would treat me like that hence i have never talked to her since feb of this year and to be totally honest i feel better for it[thumbup]

[iodillalm]

this might sound a little odd, but i've felt like i've been in a mental coma my entire life, never having serious feelings for anybody up until this point. i'm 21 now. having a crush on her and caring for her so much woke me up from the sedation.

so i guess these feelings have been building up for so long and now are attacking me all at once. they flanked me, FLANKED i tell you! [surrender]

[ftpsoft]

Well, here's what I did with a girl that I deeply loved for about 10 years. . .

Eventually told her how I felt. She suspected it, and she was quite gentle on telling me she didn't feel the same. But we still talk, because she, as well as I, both value the friendship and know each other would bend over backwards for the other.

It helped me a lot. If you don't get it out, it'll just eat at you until it tears you apart.

[Evsltkzl]

drink beer until you learn to deal with it.

[iodillalm]

Well, here's what I did with a girl that I deeply loved for about 10 years. . .

Eventually told her how I felt. She suspected it, and she was quite gentle on telling me she didn't feel the same. But we still talk, because she, as well as I, both value the friendship and know each other would bend over backwards for the other.

It helped me a lot. If you don't get it out, it'll just eat at you until it tears you apart.

oh i've already told her and she's well aware of my feelings, forgot to mention that. my situation is a lot like yours it seems.

i think my issue mainly is this. i met her in early april, we started hanging out. i didn't get my huge crush on her until about june. i told her in early july. and we both moved in august. all this happened so fast that i didn't really have time to soak everything in. and now i'm completely lost in my feelings and emotions. i just wish there was an easier way than relying on time to heal things.

[Dvjkefdw]

have to agree with DSK on this one, time and space are whats needed it got me over my first serious relationship and worked wonders

finding someone else will help, but just keep busy

at the end of the day you don't want to loose a mate so you can't cut her out all together

[iodillalm]

have to agree with DSK on this one, time and space are whats needed it got me over my first serious relationship and worked wonders

finding someone else will help, but just keep busy

at the end of the day you don't want to loose a mate so you can't cut her out all together

i completely agree with your last sentence. it's so conflicting because she's such a good friend, yet i feel like i need to be apart from her for a while to get her out of my system. bleh.

[gueremaisse]

Erm why don't you spend some time going out and meeting peeps in this new place you live. Instead of lingering on her in a internet forum.

[BronUVT]

Well Mine was a good Friend for about a year. Then ya know I started to like her, but she had a B/F. So I let her know before they got in the way of Him and her..The big prob with that all was He found out.. Pretty much the end of that.. So its been the outa site outa mind thing there. Worked, but took along time and i still catch my self thinking about it every so often.

[Jadykeery]

I've been after the same girl for like 5 years...

[Uhmavano]

I'm gonna tell you straight up, lobotomy.

[cauddyVab]

Men cant have platonic relationships with women - www.laddertheory.com

If she doesn't feel the same way towards you id cut her out completely, you will only be bringing extra luggage everywhere with you and you wont move properly or meet other people.

[sportbos]

You don't. I've known this one girl for a few years and still wish for something, even after living 1,000 miles away from her for almost a year.

[Stivenslivakovishhhs]

Hey at least you're a step ahead of me.

I'm still debating whether I should tell the girl or not. She's going to Uni in like 20 days and she'd be like an hour away.

Actually come to think of it, I think it's worn off me. I don't feel the need to tell her. (I'm an expert at supressing feelings lol)