[Evdokia]

Blessings to all. I need spiritual guidance about receiving an ecclesiastical divorce. We were married in the Greek Church; however, I have been a member of the Russian Church (oca), as has my husband, for over three years. Does not my membership in the Russian Church advocate I follow their divorce guidelines, or am I bound by what jurisdiction I was married in? I have the same sf as I did when I converted and he is from the Greek Archdiocese, btw.

The idea of an ecclesiastical divorce frightens me, simply because of what is happening in my civil divorce. My husband is a pathological liar and is operating in "revenge mode" (what my priest said). He is refusing to support his children and has also moved to a different state. What scares me is that my future in the Church could be dictated by his lies. Is this a lack of faith on my part? Can I put my faith in the Greek Archdiocese in their determination?

Forgive me,
Christina

[Sydrothcoathy]

We were married in the Greek Church; however, I have been a member of the Russian Church (oca), as has my husband, for over three years. Does not my membership in the Russian Church advocate I follow their divorce guidelines, or am I bound by what jurisdiction I was married in? I have the same sf as I did when I converted and he is from the Greek Archdiocese, btw.

Generally, the Church administration that bestowed the sacrament of marriage needs to be the one to grant the Church divorce.

Your priest and/or spiritual father should be involved in your petition for a Church divorce. Ask your parish priest to help you understand the process and to walk you through your petition. If he (your OCA parish priest) refers you back to the GOA, then you should ask the same thing of your spiritual father.

The idea of an ecclesiastical divorce frightens me, ... What scares me is that my future in the Church could be dictated by his lies. Is this a lack of faith on my part? Can I put my faith in the Greek Archdiocese in their determination? I cannot say how your particular diocese handles such things, but when there is a petition in our diocese, the petition is received and reviewed by the diocesan secretary who then sends a request to the other party for their "side of the story". The other party then may or may not respond and if they do then the original petitioner is given a chance to respond. All of this documentation then is given over to the diocesan spiritual court (the Archbishop and selected members of the senior clergy of the diocese) who look at all the information that has been gathered, discuss the case and make a prayerful determination about the divorce - whether or not it can be given and if so what kind of penance must be assigned to the parties of the divorce to assist in their repentance. Even if you are the "innocent party" it is possible, even likely, that some penance will be assigned to assist you in repenting for the failure of your marriage. It may not be (probably won't be) the same as the penance assigned to the other person.

The point of all this is that the spiritual court does not act solely in the realm of evidence, but also acts prayerfully - invoking the grace of God so that they might act with God's wisdom. Do not fear, rather come to God with humility and in repentance and receive all that He gives for it is for the salvation of your soul, not for your condemnation and punishment.

Fr David Moser

[Aswdwdfg]

Dear Christina,

Thank you for this opportunity for us to pray for you. Also thank you for sharing this part of the church I personally did not existed. It is comforting to know the Church heirarchy has a system in place to deal with life situations such as divorce.

I pray Panagia protects and comforts you and you family.

Paul