[Erossycuc]

Now this has been a ''hot'' debate between myself and my s/o for sometime.I need an UNBIASED source of information who understands dogs and 'pack leader roles'.My S/o does things with the dogs,that I personally do NOT feel are acceptable to maintaining the pack leader status.She gets upset that they '''don't listen to her'' as well as they do me.90% of the time,it takes me ONE command to make them listen.10% of the time I have to reinforce my position.They listen to her about 75%-80% of the time,not allways on first command and they do a lot more ''testing'' with her.

She does not do ANY of the walking,she does some of the grooming(25% mostly brushing and ears),50% of the play.She does help with giving medications.(She cannot physically walk them due to a disability-so I do not hold this against her)She does 50% of potty cleanup.

I do most of the grooming/100% of bathing/nails(75%),ALL of the walking,50% of the corrections,50% of the training.and 50% of the play.
I do most of the medical and the handling for exams.I do 50% of potty clean up.

They stand on her,climb on her,and sit on her while her protests to ''get down'' are ignored.She then says ''well I guess you can come up.''since the dog has refused to obey her commands to get down,she relents and lets them up-Mostly occurs with Rosie our Dobe.she says that is because Rose is 'insecure' and/or 'loves to snuggle'.

Now with me,I ''allow'' them to come up,if I give consent.I control this behaviour.I say when they come up and for how long.They DO NOT come up without consent.I am strict as hell about it.I am supposedly ''too firm'' about it.

My personal feeling about their behaviour toward her-

*they are dominating her AND not respecting her at all.

She says'' that they like to snuggle and rosie is insecure so I am reassuring her''

I feel-unsolicited climbing on top of me is disrespectful.It is not respecting me,my space,or my position.Refusing to get down is a violation of space and highly disrespectful.

Then the sofa is now Rosie and Bella's couch-not the people couch.Bella is good about getting down for me and is welcome to share if she gets down when I ask.Rosie I have to physically REMOVE from the couch.(I get flack from the SO because when I kick Rosie off the sofa she paces and gets into trouble until ''I'' am made to get off so she can lay) I have a real issue with Rosie's behaviour,and I keep saying'' If she's going to behave like this she needs to STAY off the couch''.Sadly my SO agrees to disagree,with the retoric ''It's just easier to let her up.''I have a REAL issue with dogs who will NOT get off the couch when I ask.Esspecially because we have 1 couch(loveseat) and 1 chair(recliner).I have to sit on a metal chair or a rolling desk chair,because of Rosie's supposedly ''acceptable behaviour'' in owning the damn couch.

Now in MY opinion,if Rosie(or any other dog) gives me a hassel about MY furniture-their furry butt would NOT be on it.Period.I have NO issues with dogs who give their seat up when I ask,with no hassel-sitting on the furniture when I do not want to use it.Am I wrong for feeling like this???

My thought is-
*Rosie is a dog,and a disrespectful dog at that.If she cannot respect that sitting on the couch is a privledge and not a right.She needs taught by laying on the floor like everyone else.
Her Thought-
''Rosie is better behaved on the couch than roaming.Let sleeping dogs lie- on the sofa''

Then there is the sleeping arrangements.
Garilynn allows Bella and Rosie on her bed with her all night.Rosie is up and down,usually all night.She pushes Bella off and keeps garilynn up all night.

I have the remaining 4 dogs in my room.(beep,mischa,mick,and Kainai)I allow my dogs a ''snuggle time'' on invitation(usually morning or right before retireing) then they are told to lay down on the floor(i have beds for them).They know not to wake me unless they need out or there is a problem.We typically sleep most if not all night.

I feel- Dogs sleep on dog beds on floor/humans sleep on human beds.I am the boss,I get the nicer arrangements.

She feels-The dogs enjoy sleeping with me,so I let them.Besides Rosie hates being on the floor and will keep me up if I dont allow her up and I like the warmth from my dogs-I do NOT need a blanket with the dogs in the bed!!

The lack of respect towards my SO by the dogs is obvious.They run the door,they jump on her(they KNOW BETTER with that one on me-they get floored if they even think about it).
Now granted they try it with me from time to time,but I set it right. I keep telling my so they lack respect for her and one day it will become a very HUGE issue for her and/or them.That she NEEDS to take the leadership role for both her and their safety.I have tried to explain what they are doing and how to 'correct'' it.She is just frustrated by them.I cannot blame her. I'd be pissed too if they were doing that crap with me.They KNOW better and I would not let them get away with it.I tell them what I expect of them and I make them listen,eduate them,and keep them safe.Every rule and everything I do has a purpose.
She accuses me of being to strict,to harsh,and too controling.I have tried to explain dogs do not have an ''equal society'' your either above or below that given dog.That firm,fair, clear rules and strong but kind guidance make a happy,confident dog and a dog with no guidance and inconsistant rules will be confused and stressed by lack of structure in a pack setting.

Can someone PLEASE set this straight? Am I too strict,is she too lax, or are we both on or off the right track??

[Gosxjqum]

She's being far too lax. It could potentially cause some serious behavioral issues if she doesn't step up to the plate. Its not hard to stop being lazy and train HER dogs the right way. My SO doesn't like dogs.Period. Especially my dogs but he tolerates them. We compromise. Dogs are allowed in but not on furniture or on the bed. They MUST be well behaved. So if someone tells the dog to go somewhere else the dog better get stepping!

Brutus doesn't listen to my SO and neither does Saint. However, one time of not listening and the dogs will get straightened out. If Brutus gets on the couch the SO will correct him swiftly. They just don't listen to him because he doesn't give formal commands. "Brutus, get your nasty ass off the couch!" won't do it. Me coming in their and saying "Off" will.

You sitting on a metal chair in YOUR house and the DOG sitting on the sofa is extremely disrespectful. I feel that your SO is disrespecting you by allowing the dog on the sofa and have you sit in a metal chair. As far as being better behaved on the sofa...well, tell her to train her dog and supervise it the right way or get rid of it. YOU should come before the DOG. End of story.