[Heopretg2006]

Chatting with my brother in law last weekend and the fact that I am doing Kendo came up. He said "I used to teach a girl who did ninjitsu." I arched my eyebrow.

(Okay not really, I can't arch my eyebrow but I wish I could and would have if I could have and it makes for a better story).

"huh?" is what I actually said.

He said she was a blackbelt in ninjitsu and that it was a very complex martial art blah blah blah. So I indulged him by nodding and smiling for a while until I got bored of that and said, "I don't know too much about it, but most serious Japanese martial arts people don't think there is exactly a legitimate Ninjitsu martial art in the same way as Judo, for example." Stupid me. This launched him on a mini diatribe about the "real ninjas."

You see, the real historical ninjas weren't like they were in the movies. Actually they were a band of revolutionary marxists living in the mountains that had to fight off the imperialistic Samurai.

I thought he was joking at this point so I started laughing but he was serious and continued.

They didn't use the same swords, they used much shorter ones. And they couldn't do invisibility, that was just made up, but they were freedom fighters in the mountains and did do lots of other stuff.

Which of course reminded me of The Funniest Web Site Ever. But because he's a relative and is kind of a nervous person by nature, I just smiled and said "interesting" and nothing more.

But I thought people here would get a kick out of it. Not the first time I've had someone tell me about the "real historical ninjas," but it was the first time it sounded like they were mountain-men lead by Che Guevara.

[Starichok]

but it was the first time it sounded like they were mountain-men lead by Che Guevara.

...and now that you know their secret, I'm afraid you must be eliminated.

[biannaruh]

But I thought people here would get a kick out of it. Not the first time I've had someone tell me about the "real historical ninjas," but it was the first time it sounded like they were mountain-men lead by Che Guevara. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA if they were lead by that asshole, there is no doubt why there are no ninjas anymore.

[Keyblctt]

Which of course reminded me of The Funniest Web Site Ever.

hahaha, i totally forgot about that website

[Sukadrukanga]

...and now that you know their secret, I'm afraid you must be eliminated.

Yes! Kenzan will see to it personally:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXCTnEyczkQ

Bonus video: "The Art of Squireelitsu"

(You can find just about anything on youtube)

[grosqueneen]

JJcruiser, that ninja website was a laugh.

What is it about the 'mythical' ninja with black mask, throwing stars (shuriken?) and all that attracts people? I mean, if there were 'real' ninjas today they'd probably be classed as terrorists and shipped off to Guantanamo bay.

[Hmntezmb]

Yes! Kenzan will see to it personally:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXCTnEyczkQ

My minions are everywhere.

[dgdhgjjgj]

if there were real ninjas, they'd probably post on kendo-world forums about how there's not really ninjas so that no one would ever suspect that they were in fact a ninja

[SHaEFU0i]

I have brother-in-law that loves to lecture people on conspiricy theories, including ninjas and all that stuff. He reckons a friend of his can kill people with his mind, using chi. His MIND, MAAN!! There is no point arguing with him, its hard enough work just trying to change the topic of conversation.

[bZEUWO4F]

btw.... there' no such thing as ninjas .>

[RichardFG435]

I love a good ninja thread!

What is it about the 'mythical' ninja with black mask, throwing stars (shuriken?) and all that attracts people? I mean, if there were 'real' ninjas today they'd probably be classed as terrorists and shipped off to Guantanamo bay.

Of course they are real today (didn't you read the website?) but I don't think they are terrorists. Just neomarxist naturalists living in anarcho-syndicate communes fighting off outdated imperialistic samurai dogma.

That was another thing my brother in law said (bear in my this guy graduated summa from NYU and is not an idiot in other aspects of his life): they didn't really use shuriken. I have no idea why he was so fixated on this aspect, but he was quite eager to tell me how they didn't use katanas but instead "really short" swords. I couldn't care less whether historical ninjas used shuriken or not, but I just about lost it with the "they lived in the moutains" bit. It's still cracking me up three days later.

[Veveseinlep]

I remember Human Weapon on Discovery channel did an episode on Ninjitsu. It's just stuff that people used to do back then that were different than the "normal" or "orthodox" ways samurai used to do. Henchmen, pawns, etc...

Just stuff that samurai wouldn't do... like Krav Maga LOL

[k1ePRlda]

Well, in the spirit of a good ninja thread, ie one that doesn't go near anything that might be factual (read the previous post) and which would probbaly be highly offensive to those people who practise ninjitsu (?) I give you this:

http://ie.youtube.com/watch?v=JdLCEwEFCMU

[BitStillrhile]

Of course they are real today (didn't you read the website?) but I don't think they are terrorists. Just neomarxist naturalists living in anarcho-syndicate communes fighting off outdated imperialistic samurai dogma.

Huh...




...On our planet, we call them bums.

[Everwondopedo]

Fred-san:

That was a chipmunk. Chipmunk ≠ Squirrel.

Squirrels are the True Path Ninja.

Chipmunks are the backyard Ninjer Squad Members.

Any questions?


Mark Deeply Penitent (ahh by now, ya'll got the drill) Ninja Squirrel

[rowneigerie]

which would probably be highly offensive to those people who practice ninjitsu (?) I give you this:

I submit to you, that any practicing Ninja would in all likelihood, be too busy killing off secret agents and world dignitaries to really take notice, (and thereby offense) -by things posted randomly on Kendo World.

[steansathtpos]

I remember Human Weapon on Discovery channel did an episode on Ninjitsu.

Oh, there's a nice reputable source right there. Don't take this the wrong way but you might want to upgrade your research skills.

sean

[jisee]

Huh...
...On our planet, we call them bums.

You didn't get the reference?

I am disappointed, Kenzan-san. I'm afraid that means -rep.

[DrBrightonone]

You didn't get the reference?

I am disappointed, Kenzan-san. I'm afraid that means -rep.

No my fault.
Too many 4th of July Hot dogs lodged in my brain.
I'm afraid you'll have to dumb it down a notch today.

[stutnerman]

Mark Deeply Penitent (ahh by now, ya'll got the drill) Ninja Squirrel

Sigh..Fine!
You're back in the club.
The Re-initiation will commence shortly
Please pick up your Monogrammed Speedos and Cricket bat from the club officers and report to the wading pool filled with Pineapple Jello at 1800 hrs.