[brulpcoersero]

Its not the guilt that is overwhelming for him, its the effort you expect him to put out. A cheater that truly wants to make things work out, should feel grateful and willing to kiss your a*s 24/7 anything short of that, they are not remorseful but only looking for an easy way out and hoping you ignore they are a cheating lying a*shole.
Your husband is not sorry, he feels obligated and inconvienianced at the moment. Do not put too much faith in the counseling, it takes two to make it work and he obviously feels like it was not that big of a deal.
You can not make any excuses for his behavior, too f*cking bad if its difficult, you are the victim and injured party here, not him.
You can not let him off the hook, when injury and discovery is this fresh and this is his reaction, then you better reconsider reconciliation.
You are better of without him, let some other person wipe his nasty a*s in a few years, you deserve better.

[freddystone]

Sounds like he wants to blame you for everything. If he is acting cold after he had an affair with someone else it is going to get worse. And if he would not hurt her feelings to make you feel better he is not invested in the marriage. He should want to do whatever it takes to make you feel better because you are his wife and you are the one he married. Forget the other women, she should not count to him, but he is a coward. Your counselor is of no help either. He/she is not getting to the heart of the matter-the affair, and maybe the counselor does not know how to get to the heart of the matter or doesn't care about anything except the fee. Find another counselor that will make your husband own up to what he has done. A lot of times a coward will blame everyone except himself---sad, but true.

[Mboxmaja]

I had the same experience with "our" marriage counselor. I say that loosely because my husband always had an out with him. Every reason that was used by my husband was defended by the counselor. I finally just got pissed and walked out. Best thing I ever done.