DiscussWorldIssues - Socio-Economic Religion and Political Uncensored Debate - View Single Post - A simple question with a hard answer . . . .

**Fksxneng** · 05-21-2011, 07:25 AM

The correct answer isn't to let go of your past but to accept it and recognize for it what it was without holding burdens from it. Learn from it but do not necessarily let it determine who you are now.

You speak to ex's only if you can recognize the feelings which may arise and be at terms with them.

Most people can't do this and usually associate certain reactions and feelings with the person and thus still dwell on what it was. Thus, it is usually healther for them to stop contact with them but that doesn't mean the internal feelings about them are removed, it just means the trigger for them has disappeared.

Anyways, the answer can be much more complex.

Wow! I never realised you could be so "deep". [shocked]

I totally agree though! [thumbup]

Its never too Good to dwell on the past too much, but really its what's happened in the past that defines who you are in the future, and maybe defines how you deal with similar circumstances that you may experience in the future, i.e. learn from your past mistakes.

I'm Friends with 3 of my past 5 ex's, we talk now and again on msn and fb, The only reason I'm not on speaking terms with the other 2 is that it ended badly between us, 1 of those includes my ex-wife.

As for selling/throwing away old things, then if they remind you of what you "lost" in a past relationship, then maybe its time you moved on and did sell/throw them away, But if your reminded of your past and can deal with the reminiscing without feeling sad, then keep them, by all means.

I've got photo's, rings, trinkets from my old ex's, I keep them to keep the memories Fresh, Losing them, would be like losing a part of myself.

I don't feel sad when I look at them, I feel Joy at looking at them and not feeling anything, anymore, Because to me that says, I've moved on.

05-21-2011, 07:25 AM	#8
Fksxneng Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 477 Senior Member	The correct answer isn't to let go of your past but to accept it and recognize for it what it was without holding burdens from it. Learn from it but do not necessarily let it determine who you are now. You speak to ex's only if you can recognize the feelings which may arise and be at terms with them. Most people can't do this and usually associate certain reactions and feelings with the person and thus still dwell on what it was. Thus, it is usually healther for them to stop contact with them but that doesn't mean the internal feelings about them are removed, it just means the trigger for them has disappeared. Anyways, the answer can be much more complex. Wow! I never realised you could be so "deep". [shocked] I totally agree though! [thumbup] Its never too Good to dwell on the past too much, but really its what's happened in the past that defines who you are in the future, and maybe defines how you deal with similar circumstances that you may experience in the future, i.e. learn from your past mistakes. I'm Friends with 3 of my past 5 ex's, we talk now and again on msn and fb, The only reason I'm not on speaking terms with the other 2 is that it ended badly between us, 1 of those includes my ex-wife. As for selling/throwing away old things, then if they remind you of what you "lost" in a past relationship, then maybe its time you moved on and did sell/throw them away, But if your reminded of your past and can deal with the reminiscing without feeling sad, then keep them, by all means. I've got photo's, rings, trinkets from my old ex's, I keep them to keep the memories Fresh, Losing them, would be like losing a part of myself. I don't feel sad when I look at them, I feel Joy at looking at them and not feeling anything, anymore, Because to me that says, I've moved on.
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