[vipluka]

And I feel a bit guilty for trying to distance myself from these things in a selfish way. That is, it seems to me, that there's at least one major tragedy within the family once a year. It's nothing but a big pile of inner fighting like the mafia, then this, and just.. it seems to me all I get is bad news once a year that shocks me. Ok, where's the good stuff? Sad things are part of life, a major part, but when it gets to be the ONLY part, I just feel like distancing myself from it.

I'm a bit sensitive to these issues as well, as in they get me down pretty hard. I'm bad at coping with things I can't control. That is, it seems to me I'm doing great, and then there's the rest of the family who are doing bad. You know, it just messes up my .. feng shui. This is a cruel thing to say. Extremely selfish. But I can't help but think, that it would be better if I never hear anything, considering the good parts are things I don't hear either. So why just get bad news? It's like being in the posting list for 'crap news about your life' and that's the only subscription you have.