[Evdokia]

Which is better? A culture where family is very important and family members are tight-knit or a culture where it's more about Individualism? I think this might be refreshing to talk about. I think family-oriented is best. That doesn't mean I'm over-attached to my family, not at all. I just like having a support group ready to help me out and spend time with.

[dhrishiasv]

I love my family but I prefer an indivudal society
because in familiar societies you can't do many things you want especially women

[boizzones]

I love my family but I prefer an indivudal society
because in familiar societies you can't do many things you want especially women

What I meant by familiar societies was just about having closer relationship ties with your family and to a certain extent your extended family though, I guess that meaning has different connotations in different parts of the world.

[WhonyGataxott]

Family. The Western experiment with individualism that has gone on for the past 40-50 years is an epic fail.

[tipoketpu]

I prefer community oriented society (I suppose you could call it a family oriented one), I don't place much emphasis on family, maybe because I don't have much of a family myself.

[obHQNsY2]

What I meant by familiar societies was just about having closer relationship ties with your family and to a certain extent your extended family though, I guess that meaning has different connotations in different parts of the world.

Then I agree with you

[G778G9P0]

Individualism.

I think I can understand why some people would rather it be a family oriented society. But the way I see it - if someone is kind and respectful, you can get along great. Which does not always come with the family per se, at all. If a family member is knowingly nothing but rude all the time and doesn't even try to be nice, I don't see why a relative would stick with them for the sake of family-orientedness.
I'd much rather have a friendly-oriented society.

At the end of the day, every person is born as an individual, lives as an individual, and dies as an individual.

[Eromaveabeara]

Individualism.

I think I can understand why some people would rather it be a family oriented society. But the way I see it - if someone is kind and respectful, you can get along great. Which does not always come with the family per se, at all. If a family member is knowingly nothing but rude all the time and doesn't even try to be nice, I don't see why a relative would stick with them for the sake of family-orientedness.
I'd much rather have a friendly-oriented society.

At the end of the day, every person is born as an individual, lives as an individual, and dies as an individual.

I think in a family oriented society those kind of thing wouldn't happen because
in a family oriented society we would teach our children to not be selfish,individualism sometimes(many times actually) leads to selfishness and creates those selfish and therefore rude people

[gettoblaster]

^a world where everyone acts the way they are taught is a perfect world. Not this one.

[bpejjssoe]

I think in a family oriented society those kind of thing wouldn't happen because
in a family oriented society we would teach our children to not be selfish,individualism sometimes(many times actually) leads to selfishness and creates those selfish and therefore rude people

You're assuming that families are naturally good, families are often criminogenic, bigoted, hateful, reactionary or regressive, just because something is a 'family' doesn't make it good.

[BronUVT]

You're assuming that families are naturally good, families are often criminogenic, bigoted, hateful, reactionary or regressive, just because something is a 'family' doesn't make it good.

most families are good but obviuslly If your familly is criminogenic, bigoted, hateful, reactionary or regressive then the best you can do is to become an individualist person but If your family is good then being close to them will be good for both you and your family

[mynaflzak]

but If your family is good then being close to them will be good for both you and your family

I'm not sure if dividing families to good/bad is still family-orientedness. Because if you are close to your family because they are good it is rather good-orientedness, as it is their goodness that makes you be close to them rather than being related to them does per se.

[TheBestCheapestOEM]

Individualism.

I think I can understand why some people would rather it be a family oriented society. But the way I see it - if someone is kind and respectful, you can get along great. Which does not always come with the family per se, at all. If a family member is knowingly nothing but rude all the time and doesn't even try to be nice, I don't see why a relative would stick with them for the sake of family-orientedness.
I'd much rather have a friendly-oriented society.

At the end of the day, every person is born as an individual, lives as an individual, and dies as an individual.

The problem with the decline of the family-oriented society in the West and a turn towards individualism is that you're left with a lot of kids in broken homes. Single parents, divorce, etc. This wasn't as much as a problem in the past.

Also, you have young kids today who are just pricks, and they feed off the fact that people don't like them and bask at the fact that they piss people off because they think it makes them special. I have seen them in forums, they're annoying. In older days, these kids would be either put correctly in line, or ostracised from the community (which actually still happens in my area today, people who act like that would have trouble finding employment here, for example).

Of course the downside to where I am from still maintaining somewhat of a family-oriented society, is that people will get discriminated against because of their last name. Even me myself, I don't associate with people who have certain last names because I associate that family name with criminals, even though the people my age in that family haven't committed crimes (well, one of the younger brothers is jail for attempted murder of a gay guy, because he hates gays).

Also I have an aunt who works in the courts, and I have heard her make statements like "oh, I know when I hear a certain last name, they are guilty right off the bat!"

But in all, I don't think individualism is natural. Even in the liberal West, people divide themselves into subcultures. You see this in high school with cliques: jocks, preps, geeks, nerds, stoners, skaters, etc. And also in subcultures in general: punks, metalheads, hip-hop heads, etc. or with criminal gangs. They're just dividing themselves by music, fashion, and interests rather than tribes, clans, or families.

I also think the higher rates of depression and anxiety, and even rising obesity (fast food rather than healthy family dinners) are caused by the breakdown of the family-oriented society.

[simmons latex mattress]

Individualism always preferred. I don't like to have to adhere to "family(society)" based social norms.

[cindygirl]

The problem with the decline of the family-oriented society in the West and a turn towards individualism is that you're left with a lot of kids in broken homes. Single parents, divorce, etc. This wasn't as much as a problem in the past.

Just because single parents and divorce were not as common in the past as they are nowadays does not mean kids were generally any happier at that time. I don't think having divorced parents or living with a single parent is what a broken home is. Just because parents didn't get a divorce back in that time doesn't mean the home was not broken. Being at home and feeling homesick at the same time is not an invention of modern times.

Also, you have young kids today who are just pricks, and they feed off the fact that people don't like them and bask at the fact that they piss people off because they think it makes them special. I have seen them in forums, they're annoying.

This behaviour is not exclusive to young kids. Many sane adults act that way, and quite possibly not for the purpose of feeling special. Some simply don't care enough to have a nice, kind, respectful relationship with their family. So why would the family members of a sane adult acting like that stick to that person? Because he is a relative? No, thanks.

But in all, I don't think individualism is natural. Even in the liberal West, people divide themselves into subcultures. You see this in high school with cliques: jocks, preps, geeks, nerds, stoners, skaters, etc. And also in subcultures in general: punks, metalheads, hip-hop heads, etc. or with criminal gangs. They're just dividing themselves by music, fashion, and interests rather than tribes, clans, or families.

Sure, but that doesn't mean thats their 'orientedness'. For example, I'm not so sure if many geeks would stay close to a fellow geek if he admitted to being a serial killer. That's probably because their common sense and righteous-orientedness prevails their geek-orientedness.

[outfinofulpv]

Think both values are good, some people being family oriented and another people being individualist.

I dont like to see the family oriented imposing laws on the individualist, and i dont like see the individualistic imposing rules over the family oriented.

i go for a big family, 4 wives.

[Dr. Shon Thomson]

Think both values are good, some people being family oriented and another people being individualist.

I dont like to see the family oriented imposing laws on the individualist, and i dont like see the individualistic imposing rules over the family oriented.

i go for a big family, 4 wives.

moohslim!!!

[Drugmachine]

moohslim!!!

lol.... I am a Christian reformist, the second Martin Luther.

[Sdzqerty]

This behaviour is not exclusive to young kids. Many sane adults act that way, and quite possibly not for the purpose of feeling special. Some simply don't care enough to have a nice, kind, respectful relationship with their family. So why would the family members of a sane adult acting like that stick to that person? Because he is a relative? No, thanks.

No, I'm not saying that, and yes there are some adults who are pricks but they are a product of our society pushing individualism where everyone is told they are special.

Studies have proven that this has ill effects.

http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/1...508.x/abstract

Also, family won't stick by a relative who is bad, but keep them in line through punishment, and if that doesn't work, banishment from the family. I have a cousin who was like this and now nobody in the family talks to her anymore. She has nothing, no family, no friends, no money, not even a job. Of course, all the individualists would have a knee-jerk reaction about how sad this is without knowing the whole story and how she brought it on herself.

In ancient times, said cousin would not be alive anymore, because there would be no welfare, and she would probably have been roaming through the woods until she got eaten by wild animals or killed by another tribe.

[ditpiler]

That doesn't mean I'm over-attached to my family, not at all. I just like having a support group ready to help me out and spend time with.

Second it