[Zysyewgg]

Funny ones for me (California/Bay Area/Silicon Valley):
You remember the names of the three closest cheap sushi joints, the location of all the Fry's in the area and which companies your friends work for that are going public in the next year, but don't know the name of the mayor.
You clearly remember where you were when the Loma Prieta quake hit. (I was in Arizona... hahaha)
You aren't bothered much by earthquakes because you're ready for them. But the thought of tornadoes and hurricanes terrifies you.
You know that a "fixer-upper" home could cost a half-million dollars.
You think the horn and middle finger are essential driving tools.
You own a Sport Utility Vehicle and have never taken it off-road. You wouldn't know what to do if you tried. Same with all your friends. (no, just my mom and it's a sissy-mobile, thank the gods the real truck she used to own died)
You don't ask the staff any questions at Fry's. You know they hire idiots and pass the savings on to you.
You know how to recognize re-sealed returned electronics at Fry's.
You take your out-of-town friends to see the techie gadgets at Fry's. But you don't let them buy anything.
If someone refers to "SunnytogaDeAnzavale Road", you laugh and know what they're talking about.
You think it's normal to see chip-design software or relational databases advertised on freeway billboards.
You know that California isn't just one big beach.
You know that not everyone in California surfs.
You know there's lots of skiing in California.
You could sell your home and live like a king in 99% of the rest of the world, but don't because it would be difficult to move back.
You have at least three computers at home.
The median price of a house is $500,000...for 1200 sq. ft. with no yard because it's a town house
Winter is when your lawn grows too fast and summer is when it dies
Standing in line at Starbucks you wonder why the employees don't call a head hunter
You stop asking how much things cost, but instead ask "how long will it take?"
You know vast differences difference between Thai, Vietnemese, Chinese, Japanese, Cantonese, and Korean food.
You know that 280 North goes west and that 680 North goes east. (I love the 280/680 intersection with 101)
Your wireless LAN is interfering with your wireless phone and your home automation system.
You were born somewhere else.
The primary bugs that you worry about are electronic.
More than clothes come out of the closets.
Rainstorms or thunder are the lead story for the local news.
You consult your horoscope before planning your day. (occasionally)
The Terminator is your governor
You can't remember . . . is pot illegal?
It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station: "STORM WATCH"
Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the US



Modified by anonms at 4:46 PM 3/26/2005

[Tactattcahhaw]

i find this funny...
Bold = true
Quote, originally posted by You Know You're Norwegian When... »
You assume that a stranger on the street who smiles at or greets you is:
a) drunk.
b) insane.
c) an American.
d) All of the above.
You vigorously defend whaling and enjoy consuming whale meat.
You enjoy the taste of lutefisk (jelly-like, bad-smelling fish) and cod prepared in any way, including fried cod tongues.
You can prepare fish in five different ways without cooking it.
You don't question the habit of always preparing a "matpakke" (sandwich in paper).

You have two cars, a cabin and a boat, if not more. (3 cars now )
You think there is no such thing as bad weather, only bad clothing.
It feels natural to wear sport clothes and backpack everywhere, including the cinema, bowling alley, and to church.
You are think it's weird if a house isn't wooden.
You know at least five different words for describing different textures of snow.
You don't fall when walking on ice.
You earn more than you spend.
You associate Easter with cross-country skiing with friends and family in the familys mountain cabin.
You are shocked if it's not 2 months of snow every year, at least!
(2months ? i get shocked if its not 6 months)
You can see mountains and the ocean, no matter where you are.
You expect all dinner parties and meetings to start precisely on time, if not before.
You fall 3 metres, and don't get hurt. If you do, you're not worried at all.
You haven't heard of "fast-food".
You can't understand why foreigners haven't heard about Bjrn Dhlie.
You're proud to be Norwegian - and you pass these jokes on to all your Norwegian friends!
Thats a lot....

[Calluffence]

wow thats cool and i fit like every one
my favorite one is u never realize u have n accent until you go somewhere else. or
no words in your vocabulary end in ER they end in AH

[megatrendsZ]

a few of them are true for me, but im not old enough to remmember all the old things their talking about

[megatrendsZ]

You know that the only people who call it "Joisey" are from New York (usually The Bronx) or Texas.
You know that it's called "Great Adventure," not "Six Flags."
You know that the state isn't one big oil refinery.
You know what a "jug handle" is.
You know that a WaWa is a convenience store.
You know that the state isn't all farmland.
You know that there are no "beaches" in new Jersey - there's "The Shore,"
Even your school cafeteria made good Italian subs, and, you call it a "sub" not a "submarine sandwich" or worse yet, a "hoagy" or a "hero."
You know how to properly negotiate a Circle.
You knew that the last question had to do with driving.
You know that "Acme" is an actual store, not just a Warner Bros creation.
You know that this is the only "New..." state that doesn't require "New" to identify it (like, try ...Mexico, ...York, ...Hampshire (doesn't work, does it?).
You know how to translate this conversation: "Jeet yet?" "No, Jew?"
You only go to New York City for day trips, and you only call it "The City."
You don't think "What exit" (do you live near?) is very funny.
The Jets-Giants game has started fights at your school or local bar.
You live within 20 minutes of at least three different malls.
You can see the Manhattan skyline from some part of your town.
You have a favorite Atlantic City casino.
You live within 20 minutes of at least three different malls.
You refer to all highways and interstates by their numbers.
You know that people from North Jersey go to Seaside Heights, and people from Central Jersey go to Belmar and people from South Jersey go to Wildwood.
You weren't raised in New Jersey -- you were raised in either North Jersey, Central Jersey or South Jersey.
You don't consider Newark or Camden to actually be part of the state.
You've never pumped your own gas.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from New Jersey.

[Nicihntm]

Charger, I love that sight! All of those quizzes are great! Many things were accurate for me. (you know you're from westchester when...)

[mikajuise]

thanks for the link!!!
I was LOL when I saw these from Rochester, NY
The only thing at the annual May Lilac Festival is snow
Toronto is about 70 miles away, but it takes four hours to get there
It can be 70 degrees one day, below freezing the next, and you think nothing of it.
You order a white hot and a pop, and the counterman knows what you're talking about.
You can travel from Egypt to Greece in about a half-hour by car.
D&C is a newspaper, not a medical procedure.
You can go to any mall on a Saturday and see at least 5 people you either work with, went to school with or dated.
When 18+ inches of snow falls overnight, but you never thought of NOT going to work.
In winter if the temperature hits 45 degrees and the sun comes out, people walk around downtown wearing shades and no jackets.
and my favorite - You can compare Nick Tahoe's garbage plate to at least 3 other knock-offs in competing restaurants.

[Xewksghy]

The London ones are almost all accurate, except the favourite movie one.

[SkHukV3N]

You know you're from the Bay Area when...
Almost all of the companies featured on your resume are no longer in business.
Sadly, so true, especially for my Dad

[velichay]

Click on the state(s) you've lived in - and see if you really act like you're from there!
http://www.blogthings.com/wherefrom.html
Holy crap, I can agree with almost all of the things from Minnesota.
This one's my favorite
In a conversation you've heard someone say "yah sure, you betcha" and you didn't laugh.

[zenihan]

BTW, if any of you are from Virginia BeaCh (as I once was):
http://www.duke.edu/~map8/youknow.htm

[dserbokim]

Be very proud to be British because...
Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke.
Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.
lol. its all true !!!!!

[Calluffence]

another one for long islanders is u no ur from long island wen u no the location of at least one strip club. theres one right near my house called gossip i was in there once to go to the bathroom cuz i couldnt make it to my house.

[Calluffence]

You know someone who went to Chaminade.
Jones Beach Theater is the best place in the world to see a concert. CASE CLOSED!
Is it just me, or is every girl from Rockville Centre a *****?
Billy Joel said it best, "Either you date a rich girl from the North Shore, or a cool girl from the South Shore."
What's the big deal about the Hamptons?
If you're not from Long Island or NYC, you're not really from New York.
You don't go to Manhattan, you go to "the City"
You know the Belt Parkway sucks!
You never, ever want to "change at Jamaica..."
You never realize you have an accent until you leave.
You know where at least one strip club is.
You can name at least three bands that came from Long Island.
You curse. A lot.
Is Huntington really that cool?
You've been to Utopia at least once.
The goddamn geese are everywhere!
If your parents didn't, your grandparents lived in the city.
At some point in your life you or someone you know has owned an animal that came from North Shore Animal League.
You actually remember when you felt safe swimming at Bar Beach and Hempstead Harbor.
Commack movie theatre scares you
You walk around the mall aimlessly.
You drive around your town with your friends, and that's the most exciting part of your evening.
On the weekend, your evening consists of seeing a movie, going bowling, or playing pool.
When you walk in the city and you see two men holding hands...it becomes normal to you.
No word ends in an ER, just an AH.
You feel like you know Howard Stern.
You live in the shadow of the greatest city in the world, but you never go there.
When you're away from Long Island, you love it and when you're there, you don't.
You know that the beach sucks during the day and is the most magical place in the world at night
You know the exact point at which Queens turns into Nassau simply on intuition.
You're still waiting for a bridge to Connecticut.
You've tried to use your father's monthly ticket to ride the LIRR. It worked.
No matter what you do, you end up at the diner.
Your distant future might involve the state of Florida.
High school sports aren't that important.
You've never been to Times Square on New Year's Eve.
You've tried to find the Amityville Horror house.
Each one of your diverse friends mercilessly makes fun of his own background.
You love that salty smell of the ocean.
No, you don't want mustard on that burger!
The most exciting day of your summer is when all tickets to every Jones Beach show go on sale.
You know White Castle is terrible for you and the food sucks. But, you periodically "Get the Crave"
You want the Yankees to stay in the Bronx, but would probably go to more games if they moved to Manhattan.
You can order a pizza pie and a soda and people will understand.
You felt slighted when Snapple sold out.
You don't associate Fire Island with gay men.
You wanted Hooters to open simply to piss off "decency" groups.
You watched a game show and wondered, "why are these people so happy that they won a trip to New York?"
You like The Brothers McMullen.
When you hear Billy Joel's "Scenes From an Italian Restaurant" you try to figure out what places on Long Island he's talking about.
You know that parts of the Godfather were filmed on LI.
You always liked Billy Joel, but as soon as you leave, you love Billy Joel.
At some point in your life, you've gone clamming.
You've been to the Tanger Outlets and came home with nothing to show for it.(many times)
You have or someone you know has fallen asleep on the LIRR and ended up in one of these three places; Babylon, Port Washington or Hicksville.
You have been to Mulcahay's on Thanksgiving Eve, the largest ladies night event of every year.
You've missed that "Drunk Train", the 2:42 out of Penn and had the dreaded wait until 5:30.
You think Islip MacArthur airport is cute and you enjoy watching it grow up.
Your parents took you to Nathans or Carvel
You hate the radio commercials for the Dublin Pub
Public beach? What's that?
You can correctly pronouce places like Happauge, Commack, Islip, Islandia, Massapequa.
You know the location of 6 malls and a dozen McDonalds and 36 7-11's.
You grew up thinking Chinese food was a basic food group.
You're used to driving down the street in December and seeing more light-up menorahs than you can shake a latka at. In fact, even your non-Jewish friends know what Matzoh is. And you've never driven more than 10 miles without seeing a temple.
Oh, your parents are from Brooklyn? So are mine!
Yes, admit it, you've cruised the Pike.
You can remember making up rules for Shotgun calls in high school.
Your elementary school promoted dodge ball as the top gym activity.
You were upset when all the Roy Rogers turned into Wendys.
You consider nachos and cheese at the Coliseum to be a suitable dinner date.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Long Island.
wow a lot of those r true 4 me

[Penisvergroesserung]

People take down their Christmas tree before January first or the first day after Christmas
People stop their car for ambulances, fire trucks...

[PharmACT]

Most of the ones about norwegian is wrong:
You assume that a stranger on the street who smiles at or greets you is:
a) drunk.
b) insane.
c) an American.
d) All of the above.
You vigorously defend whaling and enjoy consuming whale meat.
You enjoy the taste of lutefisk (jelly-like, bad-smelling fish) and cod prepared in any way, including fried cod tongues.
You can prepare fish in five different ways without cooking it.
You don't question the habit of always preparing a "matpakke" (sandwich in paper).
You have two cars, a cabin and a boat, if not more.

[GrolmangHat27]

I've bolded the ones which suit me
Quote »
You'd driven from East County San Diego to a mall somewhere in North County because of one particular store you like.
You have a 12 month pass to the San Diego Zoo, San Diego Wild Animal Park, and Sea World.
You lost your virginity or first drank in TJ.
You're enjoying 80º weather at the end of February while those up north complain about 12 inches of snow.
The people at the local smoothie bar know you by name.
Your birth certificate indicates that you were born in Kaiser Hospital off of Zion Ave.
You can't leave the Del Mar Fair each summer without a plateful of Australian battered potatoes, a funnel cake, and other junk food.
Your tan lines never go away.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from San Diego.

Funny thing is, before I'd read the last one I had already copied it to print out and take to work next week

[Mmccqrtb]

This is the funniest and most true thing i have ever read. The New Mexico section was 100% correct. Very cool.

[VitaliyMurnov]

Damn, this thing is spot-on! Living in Australia is all correct and so is the ethinicity of Korean...like really, dead on.

[affozyBoomi]

these pittsburgh ones are so on its scary... then again, its a pretty unique place. definitely made my night tho - its so funny, because its so true, which i didn't expect. im gonna do the same thing with the ones that really describe me in boldface, even tho its pretty much all of it... i actually deleted a big section about the local dialect coz they had so many examples...
Quote »"Hey Yuz Guyz" is your traditional greeting.
You know the time and location of every Wing Night in a 10 mile radius.
You know the location of the following towns, know someone from them and have spent time there: Monongahela, Altoona, Bethlehem, Ligonier, Harmony, and Wilmerding.
You've memorized lines from the movie "Flashdance".
If you're a guy, your biggest fear is seeing your best friend drive into the "fruit loop". You're second biggest fear is seeing him drive out with Kordel Stewart.
If you're a girl, you're biggest fear is getting hit on by a hairy-chested man, heavily weighted in gold chains, who refers to his friends as "junior" at Chauncey's.
Your latest cultural experience: On your way to partying at Slippery Rock University, having to stop your car to let the Amish buggy cross the street.
As your out-of-town friends brag about their latest trips to Europe, you think to yourself, "Polish Hill will suffice."
You eat out at least once a week at a mafia-owned Italian pizza parlor.
Your father has worked for the same company for over 20 years.
You don't see what all the hype is about Disney World when Kennywood is just around the corner.
You're having a hard time on where to take your date out for dinner and a night on the town: - "meat on a stick" in the south side and the guzzling IC Light at Jack's... Or splitting an order of "O fries" and guzzling IC Light at Peter's Pub.
" N at' " is eloquently added to the end of every sentence.
You've taken deliberate field trips to the Andy Warhol museum.
You water ski on the Youghiogheny River Lake.
You feel the only good bands out there are Donny Iris, Joe Grushecky, The Blue Oyster Cult, and of course.... Rusted Root.
You're more worried about Jerome Bettis's health than your own.
You own more than one original Terrible Towel.
You don't understand what all the hype is about for Rolling Rock beer. You've been drinking it for years, although Penn Pilsner is better.
You consider a great vacation a trip to Conneaut Lake or Lake Erie. For something a little more exotic, a trip to the Jersey shore.
You're 35 years old, have never been outside of Allegheny County, and don't see the need to leave.
You only own four spices: salt, pepper, Heinz ketchup, and the bottle of Trappey's Red Devil you swiped from Primanti's.
For the life of you, you can't understand why your all your out-of-town friends don't get the "fries and cole slaw" thing...
You have 101 favorite recipes for kolbasi and sauerkraut.
Words like: hoagie; chipped ham; pop; and gumband actually mean something to you.
You can use the phrase "Firehall Wedding" and not even bat an eye.
You know that Clinton, Monaca, and Beaver, are actually names of towns.
You've called someone a 'jaggoff'.
You go 'food shoppin' at 'Jine Iggle'.
You know someone from 'Sliberty, E-sliberty, or Wesliberty.
You know the Pittsburgh Zoo is in 'Hilinpark' and have been there for school field trips.
You know what is meant by "The Point".
Chipped ham was always in your refrigerator when you were growing up.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Pittsburgh.

I've only been living in London since September, and am going back to the States at the end of May, but I at least get almost of all of them and a few even describe me.