[mvjvz]

Hi everyone,

I haven't posted in a while but I visit to read some threads once in a while.

It's been 1.5 years now since IT happened. I've been mainly doing well after picking up the pieces, until last night, that is. It had been a stressful week at work and a bad Friday to top it off - people being uncoorperative at work etc. The usual me would have just shrugged it off but I had been feeling low and rather sorry for myself the last few days, so when I got home yesterday i had a minor meltdown and cried myself silly.

The world just suddenly felt so unfair. Why is it that people who are nasty have a partner to go home to and I don't???!!! Okay... I know this thought doesn't really make much sense but I think it's just from me feeling rather tired and low in energy.

Although I am entirely capable of surviving on my own in this world, I would much rather share it with someone else, and sometimes I worry that I am going to have to spend it alone. It's a difficult time when my friends are married, engaged or having babies and I feel like I am never going to experience that part of life. Why haven't I met this man who is apparently out there in the world waiting for me (my mother assures me that this is so!!)

I'm 33 and although I've never had a great desire to have children I am suddenly concious that time is starting to run out and one day I won't even have that choice of whether i want children or not.
Deep breath. I realise that life could be a lot worse and that I should not dwell too much on this but I wish God would shine a light on me.

Sorry about all this whinging but I needed to get it off my chest. I realise that there are some others going through much worse than what I did.

[8IhGpvH0]

Sadly, bad things happen to good people every day. Just because those nasty people have someone to go home to doesn't mean their home is a happy one. The grass always looks greener.

And don't worry about time running out. I know a woman who didn't meet the right guy until early 40s, got married and had children ASAP. Of course, that's not how she wanted it to be, but you play the hand you're delt.

You're just having a bad day. Healing takes a long time, whether you stay in the marriage or not (minimum 2 years). You don't heal faster because you are now on your own. You're probably not ready to trust anyone yet. It'll come.

It's okay to have a bad day, just don't let it turn into a week or month. And you can always come here to vent. No one understands what you're feeling better then WE do.

[FloareTraurne]

I sure could have written those words--except 30 something sounds so young to me now!

Remember, we have to H.A.L.T: Never get too hungry, too angry, too lonely or too tired. We'll feel worse than we have to if we are tired and lonely..

But that aside, I'm going to suggest something to you to meet nice men:
Dance lessons

I'm serious---what a secret! Google dance lessons in your area. Sign up for country 2-step (yes, I know you might not like country and perhaps you don't want to meet a cowboy) BUT you'll get used to country western (I'm actually enjoying it now!) AND most of the men are not "cowboys"!

Country 2 step is good because you dance close but not too close and it is the most common dance out there as far as nightlife. You'll stumble with each other, laugh, change partners constantly (think speed dating except you are dancing and talking). Most classes don't require a long committment (once a week for a month maybe) and some even allow you to make for the evening only!

West coast swing is a great sexy dance and the folks might be younger--it is a little more difficult. (But if you are in your 30s, then the 40 year olds will be a fine target--and these guys can be great if you watch out for those going through a mid-life crisis!)

The exercise will make you feel better and your social group will expand. Pretty soon a group of you will be "meeting" for practice...

Get out there! I overhear all these men and how they are learning to dance just in hopes that the ladies will dance with them and that they will meet someone---and remember, don't judge a book by its cover.
SIS

[ziIReIGS]

I have started Salsa lessons. At 45 my knees hurt, but my behind is shaping up quit nicely

[mvjvz]

Lol ok thanks. Once I finish this project I'm on which is stressing me out to the max (5 more weeks to go) then I will seriously consider dancing classes.

I think there are a few places near me that teach dancing but I'm not sure that it's the right kind - they may be the more modern kind as opposed to what you're talking about, SIS. Still, no harm in looking into it. Thanks for the tip!

I'm feeling a little better after having 2 days to chill out on the weekend. Played some sport this afternoon and no doubt I will be very sore tomorrow but it was all good fun.
Thanks for listening.

[Mypepraipse]

Sis is right, it's never too late to start a new life. As for your meltdown, hey we all had to go through little moments, I think it's what keeps a person sane amongst all the issues. You have a right to have a moment of feeling sorry for yourself. But you are a strong enough person not to lay in that sorrow. Just as long as we dust ourselves off and move on, forward, a new life out there. Never forget that it is out there. Your just being more choosy now than before. That's good too.

[gennickhif]

i feel the same way now. im 35 and really, who wants a 35 yo man?

[Mypepraipse]

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[mvjvz]

CheatedHusband - I do!! I would love to meet a 35 year old
I've decided I need a man older than I am - they're more mature (I hope)
DOn't give up - you'll find someone, and I hope I will too!

[TerAlelmlor]

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