[ashleyjoseph]

If you can't cope, it's usually because you don't want to. I know people who worked 3 jobs, 60+ hours a week plus night shifts AND did their bachelor and masters afterwards. If you have a point that you want to reach, you will. But remember, there's no shame in not coping. And if you have to force yourself to do something to the point where you are seriously questioning it, it's probably not worth it either.

A little anecdote: I moved to the UK all by myself a year ago just to get some fresh perspectives in life. I wanted to attend Coventry this year, but now it turns out due to my financial circumstances that I'd probably have to rearrange my priorities and push my studies back for a year or two. I'm working in a warehouse 10 hours a day and won't get a second job not because I'm lazy, but simply dead-tired. Like zombie'ish. Go-right-to-sleep-after-work sort of. Right now I'm thinking about switching jobs, getting promoted (0.01% chance there *lol*) and about taking a £40000 loan to invest in property. Oh yeah, starting my own business exporting cars to mainland Europe wouldn't be bad, either. Coventry Automotive Design can wait...

My point is *drum roll*: It's life, be flexible, because shi... accidents do happen. Be it your circumstances or the fact that you can't cope. And it's not the end of the world. There's plenty of things to do and find out, and that's it.

@Superfresa: Just out of curiousity, considering that you live in Canberra, where do you study? NSW or VIC, perhaps Monash University? RMIT? Swinburne?

[SigNeewfoew]

I wish I studied in Monash/RMIT... They work with Holden and Ford!

Nah, I live in rural New South Wales on a property and drive into Canberra every day to study and work. I study at the University of Canberra.

I guess I just generally say I live in Canberra because I dont think "Bungendore NSW" has any international relevance - and even then, I dont live there but in a property some distance from there.

You know a lot about this little area of the world! Been here before?

[ashleyjoseph]

Not to hijack this thread, but I lived in Melbourne for 5 years, did my VCE, got into Monash Arts

I thought it was the other way around, you living in Canberra and studying in a different state. But the University of Canberra is great too, perhaps not for industrial design, but for media, politics, journalism etc.

[SigNeewfoew]

its pretty good for industrial design. Its ranked quite well. It just doesn't have transport design unfortunately. Monash and RMIT are in another league if what you want to do is transport design (which I do) but I have other reasons to be here. I'm thinking of a postgraduate in transport design down in Melbourne...

*back on topic *

[ProomoSam]

I think a lot of people are kinda harsh in their replies (no offense). All he asked was advice for motivation, if he is doing 3 jobs and going to college i think that more than qualifies as "working hard". Sure it is a good motivation to think about your future and how easier it will be to follow your dreams if you have your diploma but life is also about enjoying and relaxing. From personal experience time is far too precious and valuable and along with work and studying you MUST also find a way to relax and enjoy it Steve. I do not know what type of jobs you have and how many hours you spent on them but my advice is only keep them IF you absolutely need the money. I am only saying this cause i knew people who where working like dogs so that they would make a lot more money than they needed to spent. I say if you are going to college treat that as a job on its own and the most important (assuming you really want that diploma) but do not take extra jobs unless the total amount of money you get from them is just enough to pay for school, rent and food. If you live on your own consider moving into a shared house or finding at least 1 room mate to share bills. Bottom line is follow your dreams (if they are your dreams) but don't forget to live and be happy in the process. Happiness should be your greatest motivation in finishing school IMO

[ProomoSam]

Quote:

[SigNeewfoew]

I think I scared Steve away by asking him a question that some thought obvious, in the Closet thread. I mean, we were only wondering and just needed an answer, and records show he read it, but he hasn't been arround since.

Hopefully, whatever the reason why he felt it was that daunting to answer the question, will be overcome and he will return, even if he doesn't end up answering....

[XGoFivk7]

Wha? What question did you ask Fresa? *Goes to check thread, BRB in a sec!*

[XGoFivk7]

AHAHA. I'm not gay lol. Not that I have anything against people who are into the same sex, I just personally, am not.

Thanks Cosworth for your worthy contribution and resolution into my matter. I'll definetley think of the happiness it can bring, but right now, it's getting a little submissive, and a little tedious.

[ashleyjoseph]

I agree about what CosworthKid said about enjoying yourself. Another thing to keep in mind is that you are only young once. At this age, you should be hauling your behind between friends, parties and girlfriend(s), not just sit in books and work all day and night.

[XGoFivk7]

Okay so I'm good at drawing cars, and my knowledge on them is better then average.

But them, along with other things, take up to much space, and I miss out on alot of other stuff.

Like, let's say for example, that I'm out on a nice drive with my girlfriend on a sunday, and she's driving. Instead of listening to her, I'm looking out the window for cars, concentrating on my music.

I walk by people in the halls at college, some who smile at me, others who look beautiful, or smart, or really nice, and I have my headphones on... and as much as I want to say something to them, and know them, I'm so withdrawn and shy, that I say nothing.

I suck at school. Likely because I have my head so filled up with car **** that I refuse to let anything else in that isn't related to cars. Music is my passion, and if I'm not hanging out with friends, I'm on msn consumed with the fact that I'm waiting for them to come online so I can ask them to hang out, then hang out and not pay attention to them and only think of cars and music.

There has to be something MASSIVELY wrong with me. I'm getting lazy too, and I don't get up to go look for a job, even though I quit my last one a month ago, and I'm in debt 1300 dollars. I have no motivation, and my girlfriend is threatening to break up with me cause she likes this one dude (I think).

I don't need her in my life anyways, she's no big concern.

I realize this isn't a psychiatric forum LOL but maybe some people could give me some advice, cause I think I have a problem here. I'm un-sociable, secluded, one-minded, and beginning to get lazy. I need help I think.

I want to change. Any suggestions?

[orapope]

I can say I'm sorta the same way...you gotta just relize that theres ALOT more to life than cars and music. Ima total spaz when it comes to females too. This is what I've been doing lately:
-When your out in public, take the headphones off.
-When someone says hello, speak back, or say hello first if they smile at you (if your brave or interested enough spark a convo, i would but im not that social of a guy)
-When with friends, your with friends.
-Draw and get into other things besides cars. I.E-I'm very interested in architecture, Art, fashion (esp shoes, and starting my clothing brand), music, poetry, rapping, history, my own spiritual beliefs, seeing the world and the underground of american politics.
-You gotta shake off the laziness and procrastination(i no sp.) when your body/etc tells you "i dont feel like it" get up and do it anyway.
- Change starts within yourself, you have to decide to change yourself, dont wait too late when everyone stops dealing with you.
-and to close with a line from one of my poems "...gotta start sky diving and stop bungee jumping". just take a shot in the dark.

[Siliespiriulk]

Quote:

[ProomoSam]

I got similar "symptoms" and i am older than you, i think swizzle does have a good point. If this is something that bothers you you need to find out what will make things better or different . Seeing a specialist might be a good idea although finding the right one for you is not as easy. There was a time in my life where i seeked professional help and i had to go through a few therapists before i found out the one which made more sense for me. You must not panic or start thinking there is something really wrong with you cause you would be surprised at how many people go though similar motions in their life and especially in your age bracket. Speaking to someone who you trust will help you a lot, just don't get stuck into any mind trip, what you are experiencing is pretty normal IMO, its just not good or "healthy" for you and you need to get past it. I left a lot of things unresolved for a long time and even though at the moment i am going through a peaceful enough period in my life i am still carrying the emotional scars of the past (for example i am unable to force myself to get a regular job). The sooner you look into it the better for you

[VeniHemealm]

That's a tricky one. I know what you mean though. Sometimes I'm studying / doing an exam and just can't get cars out of my head. And sometimes it's like "Grrr! cars are so nerdy, why do I like 'em anyway?" Having 3 jobs and college must be very stressful, but I think I can help you:

Do other stuff you love. (Obvious, but I said it.)

And, this might sound a bit odd, but don't drive as much. Use other modes of transport when you can - plane / train / bicycle / motorbike / scooter / rocket powered horse.

If all else fails, like swizzle said, see a proffesional.

[BEyng6hj]

Hey there Steve! I hope what i am about to say helps you out.......

Sit down one day (ASAP), in your favourite haunt, and just try to forget everything in your life for a brief amount of time.
When you feel calm and your mind is cleared of all negative thoughts, think of all the people who matter to you the most in this world. It could be your parents, your best friend, your GF, a mentor or anybody else. Heck, if you can't think of anyone just think of God. Then imagine yourself at the end of your life...........and when you look back at life i know that you wouldn't want to say 'what if....'. You would want your life to be full of achievements and happiness and you'd want it to be something to be proud of. You'd want to have lived your life to the fullest. You'd want to have made all those you love and those who really care about you proud.

At this point, try and understand what happiness really means to you. Is it having a great job (which you enjoy too) and a well settled family? Is it being a high flyer in the automotive industry (or any other for that matter), or is it anything else?
>>>>>>>Whatever it may be, you have to understand what you need to do in life to reach that wonderful destination. Then slowly think backwards.............(you're imo extremely good at drawing cars)............so if happiness means getting your dream job being a car designer, or whatever else it may be, you've gotta realize that in reality that's gonna require some minimum amount of qualification. That may be getting a degree in arts or engineering or whatever. That may be doing a masters in transportation design.
And for that you must finish your college, right? And then you've got to have something good to show those Uni's and you've gotta study hard to get in there, right?
My friend, once you've understood this, you should have no problem coming to terms with the fact that things may seem unfairly tough now but look at the big picture 10 years down the line.......the happiness and stability a good job will bring you is much more important and really worth working hard for. As they say, its better to prevent than to cure and so its better to work hard now than to repent 10 years later.

So try and reorganize your thought process..........force yourself to go to college everyday and try to concentrate on your work keeping in mind that this is precisely what is gonna help you in being a step closer to achieving your dreams and happiness in life. Do this conciously for a few weeks and soon you'll find that it ain't really so hard and you'll start liking your work too. Soon it'll become a part of your subconcious and you'll be doing your work automatically. You'll also find that once your work is getting done at the right time, your confidence levels will rise tremendously and you'll surely be less withdrawn and un-sociable.

With regard to your money situation, i'll say try to save as much as possible, dont spend unnecesarily and never binge or shop more than your budget can hande. Soon you'll find more money in your hand, which you can use on more important things. Lastly, is there any family member/relative whom you can ask for a little financial help? If yes, then please take their help asap. Trust me, there is no shame in taking a little help from your family coz that's what they're there for.
I just wanna say that have fun, be jolly but always be focused and never lose sight of the target in front front of you! IMO you're a really cool dude, and i know you will not have a problem handling things coz you know you're strong enough to face any challenge!
Living you're life the right way and making the most of it should be motivation enough! And just one more thing.......work hard(now), pary harder(later)! Let music and friends take a bit of a back seat now, coz once your settled you'll have your whole life to do anything and everything you like! Best of luck with everything!!

[XGoFivk7]

My overall class grades are down, and I'm skipping my Prof lectures all the time.

I'm sooo sick of school. I could quit, but I don't want too. It's not fair to me, because I have to balance all this school s**t and work ( 3 jobs ) and paying groceries and rent.

I could drop a job, but then I wouldn't be able to pay rent... do you see where this is going?

I need some incentive... does anyone have any ideas for what I could do to get my brain and focus on school?

I really don't want to drop out... I got handed my Retirement form from the Dean the other day, and was told that if I didn't start attending class that I could sign it.

Hell I'm skipping a class right now.

I wish I could focus on school like I do cars.

I need my school though, someone give me some suggestions.

Steve.

[KitRittyTug]

what school are you attending? post secondary? If so don't stop, you will regret leaving and going back will be harder the longer you are out of school.

Unless you are in high school, and if you are, then I seriously suggest finishing that.

[Cnbaapuy]

I don't mean to sound rude, as I'm not real familiar with your circumstances, but you have to take the initiative to motivate yourself. Don't you think that every kid has trouble focusing in school, especially those who--like you--are worrying about jobs/paychecks, rent and supporting themselves? If anything, situations like these should be motivation in and of themselves; if you don't make the effort to do well in school, then there's the distinct possibility that this paycheck-to-paycheck living scenario will last your whole life. You just have to suck it up, buckle down, and make peace with the fact that the work you're doing in class--as monotonous and seemingly useless as it may sometimes seem--will pay off down the road. You have to look out for yourself, man, and that entails thinking in the long term--college, and ultimately the dream job that will allow you to support yourself and your family while doing what you love.

I'm not saying that college is a requisite for success, but it sure as hell increases your chances. And if you quit on school now, like Ascariss said, it will be ten times harder to get back into that groove and apply yourself down the road. I'm sorry you're stressed and overworked; it's not fair, but it's life. And if you want to get out of that rut and ensure yourself a more comfortable lifestyle later on then you're just gonna have to deal with it.

I always had this poster on my wall as a kid.

[KitRittyTug]

remove the viper and replace it with a koenigsegg lol funny enough I spelled koenigsegg correctly